Listening with open hearts is basis for new lay pastoral caregiver training

Patty Marriott worked as a nurse for her entire career — a profession she chose because of her desire to care for patients.

In her retirement, she noticed something missing from her day-to-day routine and felt called by the Holy Spirit to apply for the pastoral care coordinator position at Come to the Water ACC, which includes the parishes of St. Nicholas in Belle River, Immaculate Conception in Osakis and St. Mary in Alexandria.

“There is something about ministering to people who are desiring the presence of Christ in their lives,” Marriott said.

Marriott is responsible for the coordination of outreach to homebound Catholics in the Alexandria area. She also recruits, trains and educates volunteers for the mission of bringing Jesus to others through visits and providing the Eucharist.

Despite all the training she received as a nurse, Marriott did not feel fully prepared for her new responsibilities.

“As a nurse, we were not allowed to focus on spiritual needs,” Marriott said. “I knew how to do home visits but I hadn’t done them in a spiritual capacity.”

When Marriott learned of a new program to train lay caregivers, she felt encouraged to enroll. The program is provided through the Bridge Builders for a Thriving Mission grant and was created to meet a ministry need identified by area pastors.

“Our team was hearing that there were needs for listening companions within ACCs,” said Sam Rahberg, associate director of Bridge Builders for a Thriving Mission. “Priests were feeling the weight of pastoral care and were not able to meet the needs alone, so they were looking for some lay involvement.”

Patty Marriot, right, visited Pam Arnold in her home to provide the Eucharist, prayer and fellowship. (Photography by Kathy Ballou/ for the Central Minnesota Catholic)

The program’s mission is to equip compassionate listeners to offer pastoral care in various settings — to be a nonjudgmental listening presence.

“There is value in the personal formation that happens. People shared with us that the experience of the formation has allowed them to grow in their interactions, particularly in asking more open-ended questions and listening with the ear of their heart,” Rahberg said.

Brenda Taylor, a member of the Isanti Area Catholic Community, felt drawn to the program’s focus on listening.

“When I was younger, I didn’t know how to respond to people who felt left behind by the Church — whether it was because of divorce or some other reason,” Taylor said. “I’ve learned you can meet them where they are and provide care just by listening and to recognize that when a person pauses, it’s not time to jump in. The Holy Spirit is working in those times of silence.”

Marriott, too, recognized the importance of the role of listening in her pastoral caregiving work.

“We are touching hearts and maybe repairing things, too. Some people haven’t had the best relationship with the Church. We are not out there to fix things, but we are there to listen with an open heart and to be the presence of Christ,” she said.

“It’s different than just having a friend come visit. Being able to provide the Eucharist to those who would not be able to receive it otherwise is a way to keep them connected to our Church and parish community.”

Since attending the program, both Marriott and Taylor have expanded their role in ministry.

“I have continued to provide Communion to the homebound and I’ve also started to help those who have lost loved ones,” Taylor said. “I make phone calls to see how people are doing, what our ACC can do for them or if there’s anything they need.”

Marriott shared her experience with the team of volunteers she leads.

“I took all the things I had learned from the class and put together a folder with that information and items specific to our church. Then I started doing trainings with people who were already doing home visits and bringing Eucharist to the homebound,” Marriott said. “I love teaching them about why we do this. We are called as a community to bring Christ to others. It shouldn’t be a ministry of just one or two people.”

The first group of 14 participants completed the program in April. Another cohort will begin this fall.

The training program, provided at no cost to members of the Diocese of St. Cloud, consists of two weekend retreats, four virtual sessions and additional Circles of Care meetings.

“We welcome an ecumenical audience,” Rahberg said. “The ideal candidate is someone who feels called to the ministry of pastoral care within their ACC. But we are learning through the process that there may be a wider appeal for the core concepts that are at the heart of this process — especially related to building bridges in a time when people are feeling more divided.”

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For more information about the Lay Pastoral Caregiver Program or to register, visit thrivingmission.org/post/lay-pastoral-caregivers-training.

Author: Amber Walling

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